Pizza Pop!

[yamamanama]

For whatever reason, it never got released in the US. I say “whatever” because there’s not a lot of text, and it’s not particularly Japanese; this game looks like an American comic strip and most cultures have flatbread and most of those cultures that have a form of flatbread have figured out the art of putting things on top of the flatbread and voila, pizza. I mean, we’re heading into “a taco is a pizza” territory here. I know they’re sandwiches in Indiana. And if you’re wondering the story behind this, a tacomat moved in to a neighborhood and the condominium association was like “we don’t need a tacomat” (except maybe with more racial slurs) but there was an exemption for sandwich bars and so the judge decided that tacos are sandwiches and there’s nothing saying that a sandwich shop has to sell American sandwiches.
This is like how the Catholic Church has determined that the capybara is a fish so that people could eat them during Lent.
Massachusetts says otherwise. Interestingly, it had the same result. Exclusivity clause.
A sub is a sandwich even though there’s only one outer piece.





I took these screenshots last because I didn't realize there was an intro that explained the plot until after I beat the game and realized "oh, hey, yeah, there's a PLOT here. I mean, it's not much of a plot even by NES standards but it's a plot."


That ring costs 10,000 dollars or 16,000 dollarydoos I don’t think pizza delivery is going to pay for it. That's like 22,000 dollars in today's money.


That's like 22,000 dollars in today's money.


Anyway, we see our rival here and though he does kinda steal our protagonist's thought bubble, we never actually see them together.


Oh no! This game is in Japanese. There's gotta be a translation somewhere.


You don’t really need a translation patch for this game unless you really, really, really need to know what kind of pizzas you’re delivering.


He looks like the kind of guy who should be operating an old timey elevator at a hotel so maybe he just took pizza delivery as a second job to pay for that ring.


The cats sleep until they wake up and then walk around.


You can squash them by jumping on them and then swat them away with the pizza box.


The dogs run after you. They’re probably after your pizza.


Hot dog vendors don't do anything.


I can't tell what it says in that window.


I think this game is set in the same NYC-with-the-serial-numbers-filed-off city that Hey Arnold takes place in.


We fight this guy twice. Well, actually, we don't fight him at all. We just have to fight the cats.


I think the hula girl might be Roll.


The message at the end of the level is the same each time.


We tally up the points and on to the next delivery.


That actually sounds kind of good.




But we can't just take the elevator, even though we're clearly dressed like we know how. That would be too easy.


Looks like Donkey Kong ordered a banana pizza but since you’re delivering a seafood pizza to someone else, he’s rather pissed.


Or maybe it's just your rival.


When we reach the top, he runs off.


Either Oddjob is really big or you’re really small.


Either way, you can only bounce on him when he’s throwing his hat.


He gives you Abby Normal's brain in exchange.


Curry pizza. This game is set in Lowell, MA.


We start out with a brief Turbo Tunnel segment.


The construction worker looks like Popeye here. Since you don't have spinach pizza, he's out to get you.


The metool helmets they wear are standard Japanese safety equipment. I think I pointed that out already.


It's amazing that they can afford a pizza with all their safety violation fines they're accruing.


In the bonus game, you have to catch the pizzas and then put them in the oven. Getting a whole bunch stacked gives you more points but you can only stack so many at a time. It doesn’t matter how you stack them.


I feel like a fruit pizza would be bad if you used the standard pizza sauces, spices and cheese but if you replaced the sauce with custard or some kind of vinegar-based dressing, and the cheese with something like ricotta or, I don’t know, brie or camembert maybe, it could be pretty good. Maybe feta, depending on what fruit we’re talking about here.


A salad may not be a pizza but I'm eating a salad with apples, pomegranates, red onions, mandarin oranges, and feta with some kind of mustard-based dressing.


Oh yeah, he says come on to each boss.


I thought for a moment that this is the guy who asked for the pizza in the first place.


We're all trying to find the guy who did this.


This guy only stops spinning if you’re on the ground level. You have to swat him with the pizza box, an attack that you’ve probably forgotten about because it’s so much more convenient to jump on enemies.


The supreme pizza is just called a mix pizza in Japan.


You know, I don't have a problem with helping out with Google's image to text software. I do have a problem with teaching self-driving cars how to self-drive.


The ghosts have infinite hit points which is nice because they’re really platforms and you need them to get past wide gaps and get that key.
There’s a smaller ghost wearing a top hat in the data, along with a more different dog and a guy with a hang glider.




I don't know what happened here. In the screenshot, it looks like the mirror is one of those haunted mirrors that draws you in to another dimension where villains are heroes, but in reality, you're standing there and the mirror is reflecting you. It might be sprite flicker.


This area goes from dark


to bright.


Oh no! It’s the Count! And he plans to, uh, waste your time by not only counting your pizzas but counting each and every piece of pepperoni.


He also use wind to push you. This may sound hard but it isn’t. Stand on the edge of the screen and jump on him when he swoops down as as a bat.


I definitely don't know what goes on the diet pizza. I think it's like Hansel and Debbie, in that liminal moment where the house goes from being made of pizza to being made of healthy snacks.




I thought these guys were cops.


In some parts you have to jump on the fish to get to the other side of the bridge.


Another Turbo Tunnel sequence. Watch for the shadows because fish will jump out.


When you beat the level, your health goes back to three hearts so don’t be afraid to take a hit or two against the boss. That’s what makes the dog so easy.


I don’t know what the difference between the Supreme Pizza and the Pizza Pop Special is. Maybe the latter has anchovies. I don’t know.


Yes, I would like a pizza delivered to 666 Devil’s Lane. There’s a ten thousand dollar bill in it for you.


Oh yeah, which president’s on it?


All of them. They’re having a party. Jimmy Carter’s passed out on the couch.


Wow! I’ll be right there!


I think Mystery Man might be Dracula.


You have to hit the boxing gloves back at him when he does this, either by swatting them or jumping on them. Then he’ll roll at you, roll at you while springing up and down,

shoot a diagonal boxing glove that you can swat back,

jump and make a bunch of gears fall from the ceiling, and then his head will come off and bounce around.

81 days until the vernal equinox


If you do everything perfect, it will take one cycle plus the beginning of the second. If you mess up, you’re going to have to wait 25 seconds for him to cycle through the rest of his attacks.


And that's the end.


Oh no!


Plot twist: Nick is more like Roger Klotz. Either that, or this whole rivalry for Betty’s affections thing is all in our protagonist’s head and the real enemy is capitalism for pitting them against each other.


You don’t even have a name.



burning question: what do you want on your Tombstone?