Oct. 20th, 2006

yamamanama: (Default)
Those entries that sort of provoked my Moon Locust entry should hopefully be buried in the cold side of the Moon, the heaven whose circles narrowest run, where the cisterns turn against the men... nomadacris septemfasciata... Yes, it was deliberate. It played its part, did it not?

Moon Language
Nomadacris septemfasciata - A species of locust. I believe septemfasciata means seven-banded, and nomadacris has something to do with the modern English word nomad.
No idea what "Erecthalia" and "Porcit me te bonan" mean, or even what language they are.
Using my super Yamamanama deduction skills (and, by that, I mean Google Translator), I have determined that douloureux paradis! means painful paradise, and colonnesfleuries means floweredcolumns.
Guerre means war.
The Italian stuff is from Dante's Purgatorio, I believe. I can not understand them, it's just what patended Google technology led me to.

Other stuff!
Sorry, none of it. Immelman was around more than usual, and by that, I mean a minute and not a second, and someone from my highschool apparently goes to college with me.

So, have a song.

Eyeless in Gaza - Likeness of Summer
once I found you walking,
with footsteps gently drawing you
somewhere fit for falling...
traps and snares you'd set for you...
treasures so apalling, so dark and drear and all dazzling to you...
you would not hear the calling of a likeness of summer,
running in full bloom-
once I found you walking with fingers roaming
twining in your hair to soothe you
and rubbing eyes and laughing,
thrashing at the air around you,
open hands a clapping and marking time;
so seductive a tune, flowering perfumed persuading...
a likeness of summer, running in full bloom...
a likeness of summer, running in mad pursuit...
a likeness of summer, running , after you.
yamamanama: (Default)
The Hoegbotton Guide To Acquiring Props
Second edition, 2006, Hoegbotton & Sons, Inc.
Changes since edition one include a few minor changes in wording and several methods.

Table of Contents:
I: What The Prop Is Not.
II: What The Prop Is.
III: How To Obtain Props.
IV: A Number Of Suggestions To Improving The Props-Based Economy.

What The Prop Is Not.
It is a sad fact that much of the world is in profound ignorance of the nature of the prop, and the related events that occur based on their usage. Firstly, the prop is not the base unit of coolness, as postulated by many here who have not learned that correlation does not equal causation. In truth, the base set of units of coolness is the dinosaur (1), according to Jeff Johnson, of which there are too many to go into detail here.
Secondly, the number of props received in a day means nothing, since the value of a prop is determined by their total number and some random functions attached to it.
Someone may suggest that to solve the problem of prop bombing and further devaluement (see chapter 2), one will be expected to give up one of their own props in order to bestow a prop upon another. While this seems like a good idea on paper, this will in fact cause a stagnation of the prop market, as certain individuals will control all of the existing props, and any new arrivals will lack props.
Many believe the apocalypse is caused by moon locusts with an insanity fog, but that is not true. The locust invasion will come in the far future, long after civilization has restored itself from the ruins left by the Techno Nano eWar and stagnated again.

See this page for information about the dinosaur.

What The Prop Is
Now, we shall talk about what the prop is instead of what it is not. The prop is the basic unit of currency in the apocalpyse after the Second Techno Nano eWar of 2071 to 2089 (2). The computer game Fallout may claim that the currency of the future is bottlecaps, as bottlecaps are a limited resource, and will eventually wear away, increasing the value of the individual bottlecap. This is wrong, and if anyone in control of your vault tells you otherwise, you will be fodder for the rabid brahmin and the radscorpions when the shop owner laughs at you for trying to buy that gun with a fistful of bottlecaps.
Originally, when props were devised by Bobo in 2005, a prop was the equivalent of the GDP of a developing nation. However, many people have discovered prop-bombing, which is to dump as many props on someone as possible. This trend must be stopped, because if prop-bombing continues at the rate it does, by the time we can all come out of our fallout shelters, even Infernal Monkey will only be able to afford a pizza box with some cheese still stuck to the inside, and since no more pizzas will be produced after the bombs start dropping, the cheese is moldy, rancid, and possibly sentient.

(2) - See the Hoegbotton Guide To The Techno Nano eWar by Horace Mooncarrot.

Methods For Obtaining Props.
You might be asking yourself "How do I survive after the apocalypse? I only have enough props to buy three crayons and some pocket lint now, assuming we can put a stop to the devaluation of a prop."

Well, I am not exactly certain how one can receive props, but my team of cybernetically-enhanced research monkeys has come up with a list of suggestions. Here is the list, edited to fix words like "blurst" and "infernal money."
-Be Infernal Monkey: We all know he controls the prop market. People say "Oh, Infernal Monkey, his entries are awesome, that's why he has more props than the number of stars in the galaxy plus the national debt in dollars," but that is not true. Since my team of monkeys has determined that Infernal Monkey was awesome before the prop even existed, and would be awesome if he did not have any props, this is all a coincidence. The truth is that people think they'll have his favor, and he will build a power plant instead of taking your money and then building a giant cannon to destoy some planet you've never heard of.

However, I think this is because the research monkeys worship Infernal Monkey as their god.
-Get involved in a war. You no doubt have supporters, no matter how tuna-headed your suggestions may be. If you are involved in a war over props, people will give you new props to buy those black market weapons from the former Soviet Union that you've always wanted. A word of caution to those attempting this: Don't go at it unprovoked unless you are really good at using communism or various other isms as an excuse. Otherwise, your allies will likely ignore you. Also, don't get involved in a land war in Asia. Your allies will feel no amount of black market weapons are enough to take on LAMBCHOP
-Be female. People sometimes believe they can get sexual favors by bestowing props upon you.
-Point out that you don't have any props. Humans will have to stick together in order to fend off radscorpions, and if people are selfish, society will eventually collapse again.
-Talk about props. That way people will assume you know how to use props and you know what’s good for everyone. Why else would people pay for financial planning?

A Number Of Suggestions To Improving The Props-Based Economy
Firstly, props must be backed up by something instead of letting them remain a totally abstract unit of currency, preferably something both useless, as we won't need to actually use it for something, and radioactive, as radioactive decay should negate the effects of prop devaluation somewhat, without having to resort to drastic measures.
Secondly, there should be the value of a prop in US dollars, based as a function of the total number of props along with some sine and natural logarithmic functions to add an element of randomness, much like actual economics, in plain view on the main journal page.
This is unrelated to anything whatsoever, but is included here for completeness. Livejournal has no props and you know it.

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