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yamamanama76 days until the vernal equinox
This game is by Milton Bradley, the board game company, and don’t be fooled by that because this game is hard as fuck.
Also, I learned while writing this that the guy named Milton Bradley who the company is named after is from Springfield.
This game is very much Lifeforce but all the stages are stage 1 or stage 4 and also since it’s not Konami, there are no moai.
No Egypt or the inside of the sun here, nope.
The box art makes it look a lot more goofy and a lot less horrific than it actually is.
it’s the year 5012 and Parasitis shows up to devour your planet Abadox and also jfc there are a lot of NES and SNES games with X in them. Xardion, Xexyz, Astyanax, Abadox. Xevious, Xenophobe, Faxanadu, Exerion. Galaxian. But I digress. In the Japanese vesion, there’s some stuff about the Essler Calender and the planet-sized monster Parasitis was once upon a time a person and he compares it to the fight against Abaddon, destroyer of worlds.
The monster, described as doglike here but I think he’s more like a cow skeleton is named Bau.
He explodes in a dramatic way when you beat him.
The powerups actually have names in this game.
S is a Super Speed-Up
Tresbeam shoots in three directions
Star Beam shoots in five directions
Paradora Gun shoots rigns
Laser Gun shoots lasers
Twin Missles add missiles and eventually they become guided
Orbital Barrier Shield protects you from hits. The problem is they’re destroyed if they touch a wall. I think. I’m not entirely sure how they work.
Hi-Density Power Protector gives you an extra hit.
There’s a Z item in the data along with 0, 1, 2, and 3 but they don’t do anything even when hacked in.
These tusks are straight out of Lifeforce.
The high density power protector also changes your color.
Deathface is the level boss, or Guardian. His eyes dangle around while his mouth spews out crystals.
He’s defeated when the eyes are gone.
Bet you’ve never played a shmup that scrolls downward.
The laser is only available in vertical levels.
The worm moves around in a circle and at every quarter of its rotation, it will fire some shots at you.
I wrote “just sit here and mash that fire button and you’ll win” and I’m not sure what boss it actually applies to but the thing about this game is that strategy works on every boss.
This place is called the Deadly Forest of Blue Nerves.
All powerups are dropped by these Blue Scorpions.
Dying sets you back unlike most shmups.
Some of those nerves are foreground.
Shark Guardian. He looks more like a galeaspid. Something more amorphous and less evolved than a shark, anyway. Also he looks like he has no skin.
Shoot it a few times.
The homing missiles will deal with the other enemies so just focus on shooting the teratoma thing.
The crabs use the same palette as you; they don’t have shields or anything like that.
King Crab
Go down the left.
it may seem harder
but you’ll have to circle around to hit his appendix if you go to the right.
And you’ll be able to deal with that enemy behind you.
In America, these are the remnants of the hospital ship Parasitis consumed, while in Japan, Parasitis constructed the machinery itself.
That enemy looks like something out of Sonic the Hedgehog, only infested.
Mini Xenomorphs
These lights will pulsate
Before they form impenetrable barriers.
The robot moves his arms up and down and shoots stuff.
Eventually the head will detach but you should have destroyed it before that happens.
with the pistons, you have to pull back until the last possible moment, wait until they open up again, and then just go down.
Kind of move around in a circle but don’t hit the walls. the walls are not your friend.
Leaving the fire “alive” allows it to form a firebird which will fly straight up. At least, that’s what I think is happening. If that’s the case, you’re better off letting it.
The boss battle against Parasitis’ core.
The stages may be hard in this game but the boss fights are a joke. You know, sort of like Lifeforce, only more so.
the planet of Abadox is a lost cause.
In the Japanese version, the princess isn’t wearing any clothes.
But wait, there’s more!
We’ve got to escape Parasitis’ body with the princess while the screen scrolls faster and faster. We don’t seem to escape through the same orifice we entered and we’ve been going through Parasitis’ digestive tract, which must mean…
…
EUGHHH!!!
Looks a bit like a langolier, a movie which is really effective with its liminality despite some wooden acting or overacting but then everything falls apart literally and figuratively when the titular monsters actually show up.
Why, yes, it’s a shameless ripoff of Lifeforce but as far as ripoffs go, it’s quite enjoyable.
A typo in a Nintendo game? Well, I never.
burning question: Could Parasitis or Zelos eat Elon Musk's ego or is it too big?
This game is by Milton Bradley, the board game company, and don’t be fooled by that because this game is hard as fuck.
Also, I learned while writing this that the guy named Milton Bradley who the company is named after is from Springfield.
This game is very much Lifeforce but all the stages are stage 1 or stage 4 and also since it’s not Konami, there are no moai.
No Egypt or the inside of the sun here, nope.
The box art makes it look a lot more goofy and a lot less horrific than it actually is.
it’s the year 5012 and Parasitis shows up to devour your planet Abadox and also jfc there are a lot of NES and SNES games with X in them. Xardion, Xexyz, Astyanax, Abadox. Xevious, Xenophobe, Faxanadu, Exerion. Galaxian. But I digress. In the Japanese vesion, there’s some stuff about the Essler Calender and the planet-sized monster Parasitis was once upon a time a person and he compares it to the fight against Abaddon, destroyer of worlds.
The monster, described as doglike here but I think he’s more like a cow skeleton is named Bau.
He explodes in a dramatic way when you beat him.
The powerups actually have names in this game.
S is a Super Speed-Up
Tresbeam shoots in three directions
Star Beam shoots in five directions
Paradora Gun shoots rigns
Laser Gun shoots lasers
Twin Missles add missiles and eventually they become guided
Orbital Barrier Shield protects you from hits. The problem is they’re destroyed if they touch a wall. I think. I’m not entirely sure how they work.
Hi-Density Power Protector gives you an extra hit.
There’s a Z item in the data along with 0, 1, 2, and 3 but they don’t do anything even when hacked in.
These tusks are straight out of Lifeforce.
The high density power protector also changes your color.
Deathface is the level boss, or Guardian. His eyes dangle around while his mouth spews out crystals.
He’s defeated when the eyes are gone.
Bet you’ve never played a shmup that scrolls downward.
The laser is only available in vertical levels.
The worm moves around in a circle and at every quarter of its rotation, it will fire some shots at you.
I wrote “just sit here and mash that fire button and you’ll win” and I’m not sure what boss it actually applies to but the thing about this game is that strategy works on every boss.
This place is called the Deadly Forest of Blue Nerves.
All powerups are dropped by these Blue Scorpions.
Dying sets you back unlike most shmups.
Some of those nerves are foreground.
Shark Guardian. He looks more like a galeaspid. Something more amorphous and less evolved than a shark, anyway. Also he looks like he has no skin.
Shoot it a few times.
The homing missiles will deal with the other enemies so just focus on shooting the teratoma thing.
The crabs use the same palette as you; they don’t have shields or anything like that.
King Crab
Go down the left.
it may seem harder
but you’ll have to circle around to hit his appendix if you go to the right.
And you’ll be able to deal with that enemy behind you.
In America, these are the remnants of the hospital ship Parasitis consumed, while in Japan, Parasitis constructed the machinery itself.
That enemy looks like something out of Sonic the Hedgehog, only infested.
Mini Xenomorphs
These lights will pulsate
Before they form impenetrable barriers.
The robot moves his arms up and down and shoots stuff.
Eventually the head will detach but you should have destroyed it before that happens.
with the pistons, you have to pull back until the last possible moment, wait until they open up again, and then just go down.
Kind of move around in a circle but don’t hit the walls. the walls are not your friend.
Leaving the fire “alive” allows it to form a firebird which will fly straight up. At least, that’s what I think is happening. If that’s the case, you’re better off letting it.
The boss battle against Parasitis’ core.
The stages may be hard in this game but the boss fights are a joke. You know, sort of like Lifeforce, only more so.
the planet of Abadox is a lost cause.
In the Japanese version, the princess isn’t wearing any clothes.
But wait, there’s more!
We’ve got to escape Parasitis’ body with the princess while the screen scrolls faster and faster. We don’t seem to escape through the same orifice we entered and we’ve been going through Parasitis’ digestive tract, which must mean…
…
EUGHHH!!!
Looks a bit like a langolier, a movie which is really effective with its liminality despite some wooden acting or overacting but then everything falls apart literally and figuratively when the titular monsters actually show up.
Why, yes, it’s a shameless ripoff of Lifeforce but as far as ripoffs go, it’s quite enjoyable.
A typo in a Nintendo game? Well, I never.
burning question: Could Parasitis or Zelos eat Elon Musk's ego or is it too big?
